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Thursday, August 30, 2007

To My Early Morning Caller...

Dear 919-###-####,

Hi, I know we haven't spoken, but I feel like we're very close. You've called when I am the most vulnerable, early in the morning before I've even thought about waking up. Yesterday you called after I'd had a particularly difficult morning, my horses had escaped their pasture and had to be rounded up. All I wanted to to was go back to bed and steal a few more hours before I faced my day. Did you know that it was stressful? Did you just want to call with words of encouragement?

Obviously, the line you're calling is for business, and one would think that it might be a landline, sitting in some office, ringing away at all hours of the day and night. I can understand that. What with the advent of answering machines and voicemail, sometimes it's more convenient to call when you think no one will be there; you can leave a message and get on with your day without all of that pesky chatter. But you don't leave me a message. Are you stalking me? Do you like hearing my voice? How can I assist you with all your chocolate needs, if you don't leave me a message?

Here's the deal, 919, it's not a landline. Perhaps when my ship comes in, and I'm in a permanent space (construction continues!), I'll have a phone that stays put. As it is, my business phone is a cell phone. It's very convenient, really. No matter where I go, I can answer my phone and remain professional during business hours. Sometimes I forget to turn it off after 6pm. To be honest, at this point, it really doesn't ring a lot. I'm not bothered, I just keep plugging along, and I know it will ring soon enough. In fact, it does ring every once in a while - but it's almost always a wrong number. If I'm away from the phone, and I come back to a missed call with no voicemail, I'm going to assume that it's a wrong number. Perhaps I should call them all back, but that seems a little bit like a waste of time. It usually goes something like this:

"Hi, who is this?"..."well, you called my phone, and I didn't recognise the number, and you
didn't leave a message so..."..."oh, wrong number, ok, thanks"

In closing, 919-###-####, if you do have business to discuss with me, please, please leave a message. Don't call me at 6am, or even 8 am, I'm not going to answer. Call me after 10, and if I don't answer, it's not because I don't love you, dear, dear 919, it's because I'm making chocolates and I can't come to the phone. So leave me a message.

And if, by chance, you have been dialing the wrong number for three days, maybe just check with the person who gave you the number. Perhaps they transcribed a digit and they've been waiting by the phone at 6am, just dying to hear from you.


LØVE Chocolate

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